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I just received an email from someone with the name Natalia Sadiqova who shared a beautiful story. So I would like to share it with you guys. Do not criticize on the ‘jalan cerita’ but make a good use of the moral values insya allah. Here is how it goes:

This story is not from Islamic source but hope we can gain hikmah out of it ….

I am a sentimental woman and extremely sensitive when it comes to a relationship and my feelings, I yearn for the romantic moments, like a little girl yearning for candy. My husband, is my complete opposite, his lack of sensitivity, and the inability of bringing romantic moments into our marriage has disheartened me about love.

My husband is an Engineer by profession, I love him for his steady nature, and I love the warm feeling when I lean against his broad shoulders. And now two years into marriage, I would have to admit, that I am getting tired of it. The reasons of me loving him before, has now transformed into the cause of all my restlessness.One day, I finally decided to tell him my decision, that I wanted a divorce.”Why?” he asked, shocked. “I am tired, there are no reasons for every thing in the world!” I answered.

He kept silent the whole night, seems to be in deep thought with a lighted cigarette at all times. My feeling of disappointment only increased, here was a man who can’t even express his predicament, what else can I hope from him? And finally he asked me:” What can I do to change your mind?”

Somebody said it right, it’s hard to change a person’s personality, and I guess, I have started losing faith in him.

Looking deep into his eyes I slowly answered : “Here is the question, if you can answer and convince my heart, I will change my mind, Let’s say, I want a flower located on the face of a mountain cliff, and we both are sure that picking the flower will cause your death, will you do it for me?”

He said :” I will give you your answer tomorrow…. ” My hopes just sank by listening to his response.

I woke up the next morning to find him gone, and saw a piece of paper with his scratchy handwriting, underneath a milk glass, on the dining table near the front door, that goes….

“My dear…I would not pick that flower for you, but please allow me to explain the reasons further..”

This first line was already breaking my heart. I continued reading.

“When you use the computer you always mess up the Software programs, and you cry in front of the screen, I have to saved my fingers so that I can help to restore the programs. You always leave the house keys behind, thus I have to save my legs to rush home to open the door for you.

You love traveling but always lose your way in a new city, I have to save my eyes to show you the way. You always have the cramps whenever your “good friend” approaches every month, I have to save my palms so that I can calm the cramps in your tummy. You like to stay indoors, and I worry that you will be infected by infantile autism. I have to save my mouth to tell you jokes and stories to cure your boredom.

You always stare at the computer, and that will do nothing good for your eyes, I have to save my eyes so that when we grow old, I can help to clip your nails, and help to remove those annoying white hairs. So I can also hold your hand while strolling down the beach, as you enjoy the sunshine and the beautiful sand… and tell you the color of flowers, just like the color of the glow on your young face…

Thus, my dear, unless I am sure that there is someone who loves you more than I do… I could not pick that flower yet, and die.. “

My tears fell on the letter, and blurred the ink of his handwriting. .. And as I continue on reading…”Now, that you have finished reading my answer, if you are satisfied, please open the front door for I am standing outside bringing your favorite bread and fresh milk…”

I rush to pull open the door, and saw his anxious face, clutching tightly with his hands, the milk bottle and loaf of bread….

Now I am very sure that no one will ever love me as much as he does, and I have decided to leave the flower alone…

“Pose baru 2 minggu da amek gambar raya, semangat gler…”

“Wah, bestkan raya di perantauan…”

“Peh, havoc page da siap letak lagu raya…”

Those were the words that I heard the most for the past few days either from friends or myself. It seems like I can’t wait for the Eid to come.

The fact is, I missed those days when my family was around during Eid.

“Maaf zahir batin ye ayah. Halalkan makan minum…”

“Maaf zahir batin ye mak. Halalkan makan minum…”

I still can say those words. I still can apologize to them. And I still can hear their voices.

But I can’t shake their hands. I can’t feel the warmth of their body hugging me. And I can’t feel the indescribable feeling when they kissed me.

It’s my 2nd year without them around me during Eid so I really hope that 1st Syawal will be the shortest day of my life. No kidding.

Well, Eid is much more than taking pictures, listening to the raya-song, eating good food, etc. It should be the day of victory after we put all of our effort to fast for a month during Ramadhan. It’s a victory for those who have maximize their time praying and doing all kinds of ibadah for the sake of Allah. This is the real meaning from my point of view.

So guys, if you don’t use Ramadhan as best as you could, you don’t deserve Eid. You know what, even the people that I mentioned above will feel sad to leave Ramadhan. So let’s do our very best for the rest of Ramadhan and insya allah, Eid will be more meaningful than before.

I’ll share my experience on the morning-of-raya last year in the next post insya allah. Till then, take care and assalamualaikum.

Seringkali….
Manusia tidak menghargai,
Sesuatu yang dimilikinya.
Seringkali….
Manusia lalai,
Menjaga barang kepunyaanya.
Dan seringkali…
Manusia mengendahkan,
Perkara di sekelilingnya.

Sehinggalah tiba suatu ketika,
Barang itu hilang dari pegangannya,
Perkara itu lenyap dari penglihatannya,
Bunyi itu tidak lagi kedengaran,
Dan masa itu hanya menjadi kenangan.

Di saat itu,
Manusia mula sedar,
Pentingnya barang itu,
Mulianya perbuatan itu,
Betapa berharganya waktu itu,
Serta kasihnya dia pada benda itu.

Namun..
Masihkah ada waktu,
Masihkah ada ruang,
Dan masihkah ada peluang,
Untuk menebus kembali segala-galanya….

*Penyesalan bukan jalan penyelesaian…
*Keinsafan perlu diiringi perubahan…
*Pembaharuan mugkin menjadi jawapan…

I once dedicate this poem to my friend, Alin, during our high school years…
It may sound unbelievable but I wrote it myself. Even I can’t believe that I wrote it!
This one is a modified version which is longer than the original one. Hope you’ll understand and enjoy it.

assalamualaikum…
hey guys, glad to be back…
after a long and beautiful break, i’m once again back in west lafayette, my second beloved town in the world…(first one is shah alam btw…=p)
to my die-hard-reader, thanks for your time all this while…
and you’ll once again spend your time for this post so lets not make it useless..

i have a topic which really interest me to discuss here in my blog but since i’m just back from Malaysia, let me share my previous 3 months break first and come back with that topic later or maybe in the next post insya allah…(so the topic should be a secret at the moment…let me makes you wonder what it’d be…)

first of all, i would like to apologize to all my dear friends who did not get to see me or did not even know that i was in Malaysia for the past three months…i hope you’ll understand my condition and accept my apology after reading this post…believe me, you are all still and will always be in my heart…keep in touch and may you success in your study and your life.

before i went back to Malaysia, i have like a full page of things to be done during the summer break…things like meeting my old friends, visiting my old school, searching for chances to do community service, and even trying to join a martial art class…remember, i planned all of these when i was still in the States. but what happened when i got back? nothing of the plan exactly happened…and i thank God for that nothingness..you know why? because nothing from that full page of activities is spending my time with my family.. and alhamdulillah, that’s what i did for the whole summer break..allahu akbar, allah knows better…
i did not plan to send and fetch my little brother to school everyday…i did not plan to drive my mom anywhere she wanted to go…i did not plan to paint my parents bedroom..i did not plan to visit my lonely grandmother…and i feel ashamed that i did not even think of helping my family and spending time with them…but God helps me by planning what is best for me and thats why Allah is the Great…no one but Allah.So basically my whole 3 months were just around my family and my house..sounds lame and boring but thats what i did and i’m glad i did it…

whats my point of telling all these? nothing than just to remind you that everything that happens in your life is ’something’…(can’t find a word for that but i think you would understand…) whether it’s good or bad, take it as a learning experience…and if nothing seems right for you, nothing happens like what you want it to be, just believe that Allah has planned something good for you..your life may not as good as your best friend, your neighbor or your idol but your life only suits you…(if there’s someone out there can’t understand this, allow me to rephrase it in bahasa…mungkin hidup kita x seindah rakan kita, x sesenang jiran kita, x sebagus idola kita, tapi ingatlah hanya kita yg layak melayari bahtera hidup kita…hanya kita insan yang layak memegang skrip dan watak hidup kita…and thats what makes us special…rupanya pandai gak aku berbahasa puitis…haha)

I’ve been wondering for a few minutes but couldn’t find any idea to continue writing…so that’s all i guess…hope to get the time for next post…because i still owe you my secret topic..hehe, yes this is not the secret topic i told you earlier…hopes for great comments and advices…adios!

assalamualaikum…
finally, i have the courage to write something today…and it is all because of the boredom in this loooong spring break…haha
time xde cuti nak cuti…dah bg cuti bosan plak…mcm mane nak puaskan hati ni??

ok then, let’s talk about ‘SYUKUR’…
did you notice that all this while, you only look for the best in your life…the best school, the best university, the best place, the best gadgets, the best boyfriends or girlfriends, the best in every single thing accept for being the best…as if you’ll get an award if you have the most hi-tech phones, or the biggest flat screen monitor, or the most charming bf than anyone else.. you got what i mean?
ahha, i know someone will say ‘farah ni jeles sebenarnya’…yeah2, i am jealous…but isn’t that your real intention?? to show off and make people adore and jealous of you for having the best thing? if yes, than you’ve made me jealous and well done!! but please bear in mind, riya’ is a sinful act…(i’m using my name as an example only, im not saying that i have never show off or i’m sinless…i’m trying to remind me, myself, i and you…)
guys, can we be more thankful with what we have…(say it out aloud- ALHAMDULILLAH)…because a lot of people out there doesn’t have the life as we live right now…muslims in palestine, iraq, afghan, thai, and even in malaysia…it’s not wrong at all to have the best thing but it’s not wrong too for not having the best…think about it…the best thing is, be the best ‘with’ the rest, not beat the rest!! and please take note, this is the context as an individual…it may not apply for being the best as a community…

ok, next…
i was really shocked with the result of our 2008 GE…alhamdulillah, it’s a good shock!!haha…shah alam got new YB both in parliamentary and DUN….and we got  a new MB too!! omg omg, i can’t wait to go back this summer…talking about the election, in shah alam, the key of PAS victory is the swing from the Indians voters…and not to forget, the hardwork of petugas2 days and nights…i’m very impressed with the indians…although the main factor of their votes is because of the HINDRAF thingy, but they’ve showed that they are not afraid of choosing a muslim leader…whereas the are still a bunch of muslims who are afraid of their own religion…nauzubillah…      

       " ya allah, tunjukkan kami jalan yang lurus ya allah, jalan yang engkau benar2 redai ya allah, dan sekiranya jalan yang kami lalui ketika ini semakin jauh darimu, ko pandulah kami ya allah, dan sekiranya jalan kami ini jalan yang benar, kau berilah kami kekuatan ya allah, dan kau kurniakanlah jalan ini kepada saudara2 kami yg jauh dari kebenaran…amin ya allah…"

as a reminder for me, myself, i and you, bear in mind that the world is near to its end…think of what we gonna say in akhirat soon if allah ask us about our life in dunia…please friends, correct me if i’m wrong if u still love me…and may allah love you guys…..it’s not the time to be sad, but it’s the time to wake up from dreaming and work for allah and islam…allah has give us path to show the non-muslims in malaysia the truth about islam…let show them how islam works and how we live our life…who’s with me??!!